I had somewhat of a epiphany last night while relaxing on the couch watching television. Santa Claus is not from the North Pole! Not only is he not from the North Pole, but he isn't even from the planet earth. That's right readers, jolly old St. Nick is an alien from another world.
In recent years it has been recognized that it is physically impossible for Santa Claus to complete his gift giving journey throughout the world in a single night. This fact has even been published on the popular urban legend site snopes.com. Please see http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/santa/physics.asp.
So where is Santa from you ask? I believe the logical answer is that Santa Claus is a Time Lord from Gallifrey and that his sleigh and reindeer are his TARDIS. It is the ability to travel back and forth through time that makes it appear that all that traveling is completed in just one 24 hour period. As for the reindeer and sleigh, that must be some sort of illusion projected by the TARDIS to hide Santa's true identity.
A belated Merry Christmas to all! Happy Holidays and Seasons Greetings.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
What's wrong with air travel?
Looking at the title, along with the current news, you may think this is going to be about the TSA and the new scanners or search techniques. For those of you who are chomping at the bit for such a post, sorry to say that this is not about those subjects. Nor is this about terrorism. Hell, it's not even really about flying! Ah-hah you say, it's about the long lines to get through security. Still, you would be wrong, but you're getting warmer. For the most part, my problem with air travel is the boarding process.
I'm going to break the boarding process into two parts. The first part of this is when us passengers are allowed to start boarding the aircraft. Most flights these days are full or near capacity. That means it's important that people board in the manner directed (and this is partly because of things mentioned further on in this post). We all know the drill. Pre-boarding for those who will need extra time is first. Families with small children, people with various disabilities, etc. Not really a problem here. After that, it's usually first (or business) class next, followed by zones or rows starting with the back of the plane. First class aside, this is done so passengers can get to their seats without having to get around multiple people attempting to stow away their carry-on items. Part of the problem starts before people even start getting onto the plane. As boarding time nears, passengers will start moving towards the gate. So much so, that the patient passenger then has to work his or her way through a mass of people to board. What, you people think the plane is going to take off without you? The gate attendant will ask that people keep a clear isle, but that falls on deaf ears. Then it never surprises me that as I board and walk the isle, there are always more than a handful of passengers who decided that they are more important than the rest of us and needed to board before their zone or isle was called. Yes, a few people may have pre-boarded, but you can definitely tell that most of the passengers getting into rows not called yet are not of the pre-boarding variety. Yes, my faith in humanity as being a bunch of rude and selfish people is confirmed.
Why is this a problem? Well let's get to part two of the boarding process. This is where we find our row, put our carry-on away, and sit down. Think of it people, it's a bus! A bus that happens to fly. Why can't people do this step quickly? It's an easy answer. They have more than the allowed (usually two these days) number of carry-on items, and one or more of them are definitely too large. People get away with it because the poor gate attendants would probably have near riot on their hands if they started policing carry-on size and would likely delay takeoff. So while attempting to stuff the oversize roller into the overhead, instead of stepping into a row to let others go by as instructed by the flight attendants, most clueless passengers block the isle for minutes at a time. Again, selfish, rude, and inconsiderate. Added to this is some of the passengers in isle seats. The window seat or seats still unoccupied, some people will get all settled in and even put on their seat-belt. Years ago, maybe. But as I said earlier, most flight these days are full or almost full. It's a good bet that someone is going to occupy those other seats. But no, we now have to wait for someone to a few minutes to get up out of the isle seat to let the other passenger(s) in.
I could go on a bit more, but I think I've made my point. What's wrong with air travel? Well, in my mind it's the majority of the passengers that is the problem.
I'm going to break the boarding process into two parts. The first part of this is when us passengers are allowed to start boarding the aircraft. Most flights these days are full or near capacity. That means it's important that people board in the manner directed (and this is partly because of things mentioned further on in this post). We all know the drill. Pre-boarding for those who will need extra time is first. Families with small children, people with various disabilities, etc. Not really a problem here. After that, it's usually first (or business) class next, followed by zones or rows starting with the back of the plane. First class aside, this is done so passengers can get to their seats without having to get around multiple people attempting to stow away their carry-on items. Part of the problem starts before people even start getting onto the plane. As boarding time nears, passengers will start moving towards the gate. So much so, that the patient passenger then has to work his or her way through a mass of people to board. What, you people think the plane is going to take off without you? The gate attendant will ask that people keep a clear isle, but that falls on deaf ears. Then it never surprises me that as I board and walk the isle, there are always more than a handful of passengers who decided that they are more important than the rest of us and needed to board before their zone or isle was called. Yes, a few people may have pre-boarded, but you can definitely tell that most of the passengers getting into rows not called yet are not of the pre-boarding variety. Yes, my faith in humanity as being a bunch of rude and selfish people is confirmed.
Why is this a problem? Well let's get to part two of the boarding process. This is where we find our row, put our carry-on away, and sit down. Think of it people, it's a bus! A bus that happens to fly. Why can't people do this step quickly? It's an easy answer. They have more than the allowed (usually two these days) number of carry-on items, and one or more of them are definitely too large. People get away with it because the poor gate attendants would probably have near riot on their hands if they started policing carry-on size and would likely delay takeoff. So while attempting to stuff the oversize roller into the overhead, instead of stepping into a row to let others go by as instructed by the flight attendants, most clueless passengers block the isle for minutes at a time. Again, selfish, rude, and inconsiderate. Added to this is some of the passengers in isle seats. The window seat or seats still unoccupied, some people will get all settled in and even put on their seat-belt. Years ago, maybe. But as I said earlier, most flight these days are full or almost full. It's a good bet that someone is going to occupy those other seats. But no, we now have to wait for someone to a few minutes to get up out of the isle seat to let the other passenger(s) in.
I could go on a bit more, but I think I've made my point. What's wrong with air travel? Well, in my mind it's the majority of the passengers that is the problem.
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